So in terms of health and safety, who pose's the biggest risk in the swinging world?

Ideas and comments...

I Really don't believe it is so much as if you are straight, bi or gay as much as practicing safe sex. I have heard people talk about research studies suggesting this or that, but to be honest I believe it comes down to the use of personal protection and common sense. Of course nothing is 100% next to not having sex, but the biggest risk is putting yourself at risk. Some people are more relaxed about the use of personal protection than others, but just because you do or don't use protection does not mean the next couple has. Either way you go with the use or non use of protection, it would be wise to ask, talk, communicate with your lifestyle partners. As I have heard said before "knowing is half the battle".

Sorry if this sound to much like ranting....

I have lost many friends and aquaintences over the last 30 years to the AIDS epidemic. The first to go were the rakes, those without the least bit of descrimination. Opportunists that would rape a snake if someboby held it up for them. Then the "pretty boys", and last the solid gay couples. many of whom I've worked for and with, and find now that I miss them.The gay condo community was devasted, turnover apalling.
It's often the exception that proves the rule, but BEWARE! You're playing with a fire you can' back away from.
Would you risk your partner?

Regards, Anon.

There are some studies, links in the CDC site, that point to a slightly higher risk for bi sexual males and they go on to say that it's only because some individuals choose not to use protection with "anal" sex. There was no indication that oral sex between bi males increased the odds of disease any more than the risk with oral sex in strictly hetrosexual peoples. Sometimes I think that the health risks are exagerated by individuals who have homophobia about male to male contact. I don't think that there is a "bigger risk" with regards to bisexual males in the lifestyle. I'd actually like to know why people are able to, so readily, accept bi-sexuality in females but are so put off by bisexuality in males. Interestingly enough women and even bi women have trouble with male male interaction on a sexual level..... I guess I have trouble with prejudices in general with one exception... I am prejudiced against ignoance. Not the ignorance of not knowing but the ignorance of knowing and still being ignorant.
Ray

In my opinion your at risk from getting anything from anybody either straight Bi males/females, even yes couples. Protect your wife and yourself, use condoms every time you play, even though it's not a guarantee it will cut your chances from getting a disease. It seems Bi males get a bad rap, at least that's what I've seen in the swinglife community. I had a conversation with a couple and the husband said " Bi males are gay there's no in between.",yep there's still ignorance out there.

A comment was raised in a room with 4 couples about one of the guys cumming on anothers chest and one said "that would do me in" and I asked why.... He said he just couldn't continue if that happened to him. I mentioned that that was just a homophobic reaction and that if you're in close proximity and things get a bit much accidents might happen. Well what seemed unappropriate at the time a discussion, short but very telling, was had. Later when one of the other members of the club a gentleman about my age made a comment almost exactly as I had made earlier that night. He said " There's one thing in the lifestyle that pisses me off. We accept even hope and encourage women to be bi but if a bi guy enters a room, with us enlightened and open people in the lifestyle, everyone will either move to the other side of the room or try to chase him away." One of the reasons given for this action is that bi men are more likely to carry some disease... An interesting point is that women are even more adamant than the males about bi males being a problem. This I do not understand, particularly from an almost 80% bi fem population in the lifestyle. If we notice that most of the males who say they are bi fit into one of 2 groups. One is the very young and uninitiated. The othe is the 45 and up group who are comming into the lifestyle. Many men will not open up, even to their wives, afraid that she will think less of him as a man or worse. A big part of this is homophobia and the other is an almost unfounded fear of disease.
It will be interesting to see what evolves in the lifestyle in the next 10 years or so. From intimate get togethers in the suburbs of the 60(Wife Swapping) to bigger get togethers to clubs and bi women to what's next.

Just a thought on the subject
In reply to Greekgod:

Being new to bi pleasure, all I have to say is TAKE PROTECTION SERIOUSLY. Get your head out of your ass if your not willing to TAKE PROTECTION SERIOUSLY. For us it is awesome, heart pounding, trusting and new, but like any new toy it may lose its luster. But even so, we never wanna take a chance on our sexual health.

I agree with the member who suggests protection - regardless of orientation - is the best tool against risk.

However, being selective is also important. A condom does not totally protect against that life-long companion, herpes (oral and genital) which can enter any part of the body that has the smallest opening.

Bi males are not the biggest risk; poor judgement IS.

M&K

no protection is the risk not sexual orientation. it really gets me that a male will want to have anal sex with a woman and that's great but they get turned off and disgusted by males that have anal sex. you know i bet if they were blindfolded they couldn't tell the diff between the female and the male ass. if they expect it to feel good to us (and it most definately does when you actually run across a males that knows what he's doing) then why shouldn't it feel good to men too? it's double standards and really pisses me off. just like the no single males at the clubs rule really pisses me off. why aren't single males allowed in clubs but single females are encouraged? mostly what i've seen is it's all about the male and his satisfaction, to them mff is great but a woman is not supposed to want mmf and have her be the one that is the center of attention and thoroughly pleased. where's the equality? the right to equal sexual enjoyment, personally i find bi males and men that aren't afraid to enjoy their masculinity to the fullest very exciting.

TX, I like the idea of blindfolding people and see how they perform in judgement and behavior....Life is a minefield and in kingdoms of the blind, one eyed people are kings.

Thanks, for your insight and sharing.

M&K

In reply to TxHoney:
WOW Tx.. you hit the nail right on the head (pardon the pun), very true...

There's something about Texan's......They always cut through the bull and serve chili that is the best in the world.

M&K

women have equality everywhere these days EXCEPT for in swinging. i just think it's time women in the life style stood up for themselves and their pleasures. really i think at least half the men i've met in the lifestyle are scared of mmf is because they're afraid their signficant other might find out there's something way better than them out there that's available and wants them ...

oh an i serve up the best chili in tx but chili's not all i serve ;-) lol

In reply to TxHoney:

TXHONEY...YOU ARE A REAL HONEY!!!!!!!!!

Thank you so much for that last comment.

It's about time the ladies speak up and be an EQUAL part of this thing.

If you read my object to TT's part III, you'll see where I'm coming from.

But, TX, you have to appreciate your sentiments, vocal as they are, are shared by most women and are internalized in the interest of the 'program.'

Since you're from Texas you can handle this: the lifestyle is basically a male initiated thing based upon the 'harem' fantasy. As long as everyone goes along with that, there's no problem.

But, as you indicate, there is something from the ladies that needs to be heard in the interest of the lifestyle.

Feel free to speak here; you have an advocate here who cooks chili with rattlesnake meat (NO DAMN BEANS!).

M&K

i've been in this lifestyle since the 80's. i was single when i chose to start doing this. i've never really been under a man's infuence as to what i did or didn't do. things have changed there are alot more vocal women and women that truly enjoy it than there used to be. when i first got involved seemed like 99% of the couples i met the woman was only in it because she didn't want to lose her husband. these days there are still some of those but there's also alot more women that truly enjoy it. it just pisses me of when i see these that say no single men because it's what the husband wants and to hell with what will please the woman . if the woman really doesn't want to try another man that's her choice that's what i'm saying it should be her choice if he has the choice to select mff then she should be able to choose mmf if she wants. some couples it's just not that way because it's all about pleasing the man and i just don't think it should be that way.

TX, HONEY, you are absolutely RIGHT!

While I am a very 'newby' to this, I could never place pressure of any kind on my wife to please me with her going along with something which makes her uncomfortable. I LOVE my wife. She is not my property or collateral for other property.

As you probably know, you are speaking for a lot of women who feel the same way. If you read TT's articles, I think you will get a very clear view of the lifestyle as it is perceived, not as it actually is.

For the sake of conversation with a slant to the feamle point of view, could you start another thread titled 'From a Woman's Point Of View?'

I think I could learn from you and maybe some other males would as well.

The lifestyle, as I understand it, is not about victimizing people. Unfortunately, that ideal is not always acknowledged.

Thanks for your thoughts.

M&K

Being a bi women I enjoy the fantastic sex life I have with my husband of 6 years he recently is cumming out of his shell (bi-curious) sex just has'nt been the same.The absolutly the best ever! very clean, very fun and I would'nt change it 4 the world. (love ya baby)